Here are the mistakes I’ve seen – and lived through:
1. Employers Want to Tell Us How We Need Things – Instead of Listening to What We Actually Need
I’ve lost count of how many times an employer told me what “support” I was getting, without asking what I actually needed. They assumed. They dictated. And then they wondered why I was still struggling.
The truth is, Autistic people are the experts in our own needs. When you exclude us from the conversation, you set us up for failure.
What works better? Listening. Not guessing. Not deciding for us. Just asking and acting.
2. Employers Have a Narrow Mindset About What Is a “Reasonable Adjustment”
This one frustrates me the most. I’ve seen adjustments refused because they didn’t fit someone’s idea of “reasonable.” One of the biggest examples? Full-time remote work.
For many Autistic employees, being forced into a noisy, unpredictable office is not just uncomfortable – it’s disabling. Working from home allows us to avoid sensory overload, control our environment, and focus on doing our job brilliantly. For me, working remotely isn’t a perk – it’s the difference between functioning and burning out.
Other simple adjustments, like flexible hours or noise-canceling options, are dismissed far too often. These changes cost almost nothing but can save careers.
What works better? Defining “reasonable” by impact, not convenience.
3. Employers Don’t Want to Hear Things That Disrupt Their Narrative
I’ve raised concerns about projects that could fail – sometimes pointing out what felt like the obvious risks – and been ignored because it didn’t fit the story leadership wanted to hear. The reality is, Autistic employees often notice patterns, flaws, and gaps others miss (or don’t want to acknowledge). That insight should be valued, not silenced.
What works better? Seeing honesty as an asset, not a problem.
4. Employers Discount Their Disabled Staff – Especially Their Autistic Team
I’ve been overlooked for opportunities because of assumptions about what I could or couldn’t do. It hurts. Not because I need validation, but because the business loses out when it sidelines people with unique problem-solving skills and creativity.
What works better? Stop underestimating us. See the strengths.
5. Leadership and Boards Are Reserved for the “Success Stories”
Representation matters – but the voices that make it to the top are usually the polished “success stories.” Rarely the ones who’ve lived through systemic failure and know where the gaps really are. People like me, who’ve seen what doesn’t work, are rarely invited to the table – even though we hold the key to fixing what’s broken.
What works better? Include lived experience at every level of decision-making.
6. Real Employment – Not Just Headline-Grabbing Initiatives
I see a lot of companies announcing “Autism hiring programs” or posting about neurodiversity during awareness weeks. The press releases look good. The LinkedIn posts get likes. But what happens after the photo opportunity?
Too often, these programs don’t lead to real, sustainable careers. They create internships without pathways, roles without growth, or segregated teams that isolate instead of include. Real employment means career progression, fair pay, and the same opportunities as everyone else – not being stuck in entry-level roles forever.
What works better? Stop chasing headlines and start building genuine inclusion into your hiring, training, and leadership structures.
7. If I Get Cranky or Seem Forceful, It’s Because I’m at the End of My Patience
I don’t set out to be difficult. But when I’ve explained my needs repeatedly or pointed out the obvious (to me) possible failure points, only to be dismissed, ignored, or second-guessed, eventually my patience wears thin.
This isn’t aggression. It’s exhaustion. It’s me being pushed to the limit by a system that refuses to listen until I raise my voice.
And here’s the truth: if you are offended by this behaviour, it speaks more about your intolerance than about my behaviour. Instead of labelling me as “rude” or “unprofessional,” ask yourself why the system pushed me to that breaking point in the first place.
What works better? Stop judging my delivery and start listening to the message.
Final Thought
Autistic employees don’t need pity. We don’t need tokenism. We need workplaces that listen, adapt, and respect the reality of what works for us. The barriers I’ve described are not inevitable – they are choices. And businesses can choose differently.
If you want to retain Autistic talent, stop assuming. Start listening. And remember: sometimes what’s obvious to me may be invisible to you – but that doesn’t make it any less real.