I just learnt a new phrase. “Trauma Olympics.”
Mention that you’ve had trauma. I dare you.
The next words out of their mouths is likely going to be a shopping list of their trauma, or how yours can’t be worse than theirs.
Almost like they have a Trauma Monopoly. Or they are the best of the best of Trauma victims.
Dont try to call them out on it, either. Oh you just didn’t. You will lose that person’s friendship for life. (But you’re probably better off without them anyway.)
What should you say instead? Something along the lines of, “Oh, you poor darling. I know. I have too, so I know how you’re feeling. Would you like a hug?” then sit down, shut up and listen. Hug them some more, then listen some more.
If a person in sharing that they’ve had any trauma at all, then they’re not coping with life right now and need you support, not your competition.